Tuesday, June 06, 2006

The Slanderer & the Backbiter



In the name of Allah the Most Beneficient The Most Merciful.


-Wail to every slanderer and backbiter

(Soorah Al-Humazah, verse #1)
{That is, they will be in a river in Hell-fire wich is composed of the pus and purulant discharge of the people of Hell. The slanderer disparages people while the backbiter speaks ill of them behind their backs, thus angering them.}

-Behold, you received it on your tongues, and said out of your mouths things which you had no knowledge; and you thought it to be a light matter, while it was most serious in the sight of God (24: 15) {Many of us back bite and gossip without thinking. We think it is minor matter, however God reminds us to be careful and even though we think we are doing something little it is in fact very big in the sight of God!}

-And why did you not, when you heard it, say? "It is not right of us to speak of this: Glory to God, this is a most serious slander" (24:16)
{Many people are so busy spreading the slander they hear that they do not even stop to think if it is true or not.}

-Prophet Muhammad said :"Do you know what backbiting is?" They said, "God and His Messenger know best." He then said, "It is to say something about your brother that he would dislike." Someone asked him, "But what if what I say is true?" The Messenger of God(pbuh)said, "If what you say about him is true, you are backbiting him, but if it is not true then you have slandered him." (Muslim)
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After friday's halaqa, as any other friday evening, I had gone over to my friends house. Another friend of mine decided to join me, and so we walked together for awhile. We spoke of many things, she's a bit older than I am, so everything I would tell her she would completely understand having gone through it already. We talked about school, our interests, our lives before edmonton, our goals ...our friends. Things started to get a little more personal and I mentioned a friend of ours. I told her that she wasn't always the way she was and that her pick of friends is the main cause of "who" she has become. Before I could finish my sentence I looked up at her in awe... her hands were on her ears as she was shaking her head. "Are you o.k ?" I ask.
She looks at me , hoping that she had not hurt my feelings. "I'm sorry... I just hate it whenever people talk badly about each other...it doesn't make any sense...its nothing but trouble...I just hate it...I hope I didn't hurt your feelings, I just..." I looked at her for a while, then smiled.. the biggest smile and told her that not only am i "not" hurt by what you have just done...but I am so thankful that I have a friend like you. Thats definitely the first time someone has done something like this to me. I told her that I always encourage my friends to tell me whenever I do/say something wrong, but they always tell me "after" I've already done it...while she had stopped me in the process of making a great mistake (thankfully)
Its true...I hate it when people gossip, sometimes a little may slip out unknowingly...but for those who sit and watch the wrong doing.. knowing that you "could" have stoped it from happening...just rememeber...you will also be questioned
" And why did you not, when you heard it, say? "It is not right of us to speak of this: Glory to God, this is a most serious slander" (24:16).

So the one who listens to the backbiting/slandering could be just as bad as the one who commits it. Yes, yes, i know not everyone is capable of just "stopping" the act of backbiting, lets just be aware of what we say...and how we say it. (Rome wasn't built in a day :) )
This past year, every single fight (concerning the girls...that I have witnessed) either verbal or physical was caused by this...the act of satan.


What will we do the next time we are tempted to backbite or hear slander in our presence
hmm...?

5 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

then why didn't u bother stoping the ones you have witnessed?

9:55 a.m.  
Blogger dk said...

good question....
but how would you know whether i do or not?
Im guessing you know me cause you wouldn't make a statement like that if you didn't.... :)

well....sometimes i feel that I don't want to hurt anyones feelings...most of the time i give them hints like saying .."thats not very nice" ..."what if someone said that about you...how would you feel?" ... sometimes I try to ignore, walk away slowly....or listen..hoping they'll realize and stop...
I guess i need to learn to be more upfront so thx for reminding me and letting me know of my mistakes.

(maybe its the way im reading it but its seems to me that you might be hurt by something I've done..or maybe said..if so..i opoligize and plz forgive me)

1:38 a.m.  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

anon: before asking her that question, ask yourself the same question
Nobody's perfect

10:38 p.m.  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"I" i never said i was perfect

and "precious", u guessed wrong. i don't know u. i just happen to be on ur blog. the way u phrased it made it seem like u just stood there and watched.

and why would i be hurt? or offended in any way? it was merely a question. take it easy.

4:00 p.m.  
Blogger dk said...

lol..my bad....
...I'll take it easy...

8:58 p.m.  

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